The Unvegan

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What's with the greens?
What’s with the greens?

On a late-night drive back from a party, the glowing fluorescence of Lucy’s Drive In lured me inside.

While standing in line, I had plenty of time to check out the menu on the wall. I was temporarily distracted by the burgers on the menu, which I decided were only there so they could put “American Food” on their sign. Brushing this distraction aside, I chose the chicken taquitos with guacamole platter. The menu said it came with rice and beans, but I asked the ingredients of the taquitos to ensure that I wouldn’t end up with any unfortunate vegetables inside. The woman told me there weren’t any, so I felt confident as I waited for my grub.

When they called my number, I shot up and grabbed my food. To my pleasure, I found that my meal also came with chips, but this was outweighed by my greater displeasure, as I saw they had thrown unnecessary greens in with my food. The first, a side salad, could be tossed aside as it did not interfere with me getting to my meaty food. Unfortunately, the taquitos had been placed on a bed of lettuce, which may as well have been a bed of nails. This bed of lettuce wasn’t just a simply leaf that could be lifted and tossed to the wind, but shreds and shreds of lettuce that could not be removed without devaluing the meal. The lettuce seemed to get everywhere, mixing in with my beans and rice and sticking the the bottom of my taquitos, but the worst part was the intermixing with the guacamole. The two are just so similar in color that I had to quarantine half of my dollop. It was unfortunate, but I was forced into a position to make sacrifices.

As far as taste went, the taquitos weren’t too bad. They had a nice crunch to them, but alone they would not have filled me up. I was glad to have the rice, beans and chips (with a strong and tasty salsa) to assist in conquering my late-night hunger. As full as I was, though, I could never be satisfied by a meal so littered with lettuce.