The Unvegan

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Papa John’s

A pair of glorious meatsa pizzas.
A pair of glorious meatsa pizzas.

In just a few years, Papa John’s has gone from a second-tier pizza chain to the top level, joining Domino’s and Pizza Hut. It even has branches in China.

The Papa John’s on National Boulevard in LA offers a fantastic $6.99 carry-out special for a large, one-topping pizza. Last time I went, I ordered pepperoni and sausage, the two greatest meats to ever find themselves atop a pizza.

The best part about their pizza is that it comes with a garlic butter dipping sauce, making Papa John’s the greatest thing to be dipped since buffalo wings in bleu cheese. The pizza itself is pretty basic, but reliably good. The only true downside is the strange little green pepper that adorns the bottom left corner of the box. I am told it is called a pepperoncini, which sounds like an elaborate ploy to lure lost pepperoni lovers over to the vegetable dark side. I was not so easily swayed.

By the time the pizza was devoured and the garlic sauce was drained, all that was left were two lonely pepperoncinis with nowhere to go but the trash.