The Unvegan

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Tapping the KEG & Aviator

No, you're the fat bastard.
No, you’re the fat bastard.

Airport food is typically pretty terrible. There is a distinct lack of creativity and the prices are often ridiculous. So it was with a great sadness that we realized we would be stuck in Johannesburg’s O.R. Tambo airport over dinner. But the airport gods were looking favorably upon us on this day, as they guided us to KEG & Aviator. KEG is a pub chain in South Africa and each one has a cutesy name reminiscent of its location, hence the aviator thing.

Also, they have something called the Footlong Pecker, which is awesome.
Also, they have something called the Footlong Pecker, which is awesome.

To be sure, this would be a great place for a beer, but all airports have bars. I needed some good food and immediately found what I was looking for on their menu. Called The Other FAT Bastard (presumably a reference to Austin Powers), it was a burger consisting of two homemade patties, cheese, bacon, KEG burger relish (kind of a fruity chutney) and pepper sauce. At least this was what the menu said, but a picture of the bastard revealed that it came with a bit more. I was willing to pick out the lettuce and cherry tomato shown, but there was a pickle that had to go. I know it broke my rule of ordering in a foreign country, but I couldn’t let such a thing ruin my burger.

The burger arrived and was truly a fat bastard. I have eaten some ridiculously large burgers before, and this bastard truly had a place among them. And like most burgers that simply try to go big, the burger was a bit better on paper than in my mouth. Certainly the burger was tasty, and above and beyond most airport food ever, but none of its components were especially great.

Nonetheless, I think KEG & Aviator is a great place to stop by in the O.R. Tambo Airport. The food is tasty, if unremarkable, and The Other FAT Bastard is a challenge worth undertaking. It unquestionably helped me fall asleep on my 16-hour flight back to the homeland.