As the world’s foremost meat blogger (according to myself), I am generally of the notion that vegetables need to be avoided and subbed in for meat or animal products at almost all times. Yet, when I was given the opportunity to head to The Counter in Phoenix and try out the Impossible Burger, I could not pass it up. But here’s where it gets weird, you see, the Impossible Burger is completely vegan.

What?! Yeah, I know, but here’s the thing: it’s not made for vegans. It’s actually made to taste as close to a burger as possible, using things like potatoes, wheat and a protein called “heme” that they claim to be the differentiator. You can order it cooked however you like it, just like a real burger, and runs the right shades that beef should.

The Counter has their own recommended ways to eat the Impossible Burger in salad and regular burger form. But, you can also order it customized in the classic Counter way. My wife and I got to try them as recommended and then to build our own.

I won’t spend too much time on the way they were recommended, other than to say they were not for me. First off, salad, so no. Second off, the burger was topped with crap like tomatoes, onions, greens and tomato jam that the herbed goat cheese, dijon balsamic and English muffin could not overcome. But this was all fine, because for my version, I went with bacon, gouda, a fried egg and gochujang aioli. This seemed to me like the best way to test out a vegan burger made for meat eaters.

The result was certainly something. For nearly all intents and purposes, it looked like meat. The same went for the texture, which was nothing like the hockey pucks you might come to expect from a vegan patty. Even the flavor seemed to be pretty on par with a normal burger, but it certainly helps to be dressed up with things like bacon and cheese. If it were just straight up a burger and a bun it might have been more noticeable, but who wants to eat that way with a beef burger anyway?

Probably my biggest complaint is that it just wasn’t as juicy as a burger should be. Was this The Counter’s fault? I don’t know. So I’ll have to have more of these to really find out. But truthfully I’ve had real beef burgers that were far worse than this.

The Impossible Burger clearly has a better impact on the environment, and that is something that really matters to me. The trouble is that it also comes with a heftier price tag. The Counter prices it at about $5 more than your standard beef patty, which puts it in line with premium burger options like Bison. Hopefully as the people behind the Impossible Burger scale up, they’ll be able to bring that price down, because if you’re after meat eaters, they aren’t going to pay a premium price for something that is nearly, but not quite as good as beef. For an extra buck, perhaps.

Regardless, I want to see the Impossible Burger succeed. I love my meat, but if the world can put together food that tastes like meat, is easier on the environment and costs about the same, I am very down with it, despite having a meat blog.

The custom burger popularized by The Counter seems to be present nearly everywhere these days, and Pittsburgh has not escaped the trend. Burgatory is one of those places, which I was introduced to my first night in Pittsburgh, and another is Stack’d in Shadyside. The options aren’t quite as extensive as Burgatory, but the burgers are priced a bit friendlier.

I grabbed a checklist and started choosing away, picking the half pound patty, pretzel bun, pepper jack cheese, Blazin’ BBQ sauce, Fritos (yes, Fritos!) and Cajun fries (which I was told came on the side and not on the burger itself). Funny enough, nowhere on the extensive list of options was a choice of how to prepare the beef, so I penciled in “Medium-Rare” next to the patty I chose and hoped it would be heeded.

When my burger arrived, it was looking pretty. The Fritos in place of anything resembling a vegetable made it even prettier, although a stray piece of lettuce was sitting on my bun and had to be forcibly removed. When I dug in, I couldn’t have been happier with the ingredients. The sauce had a nice kick to it to complement the cheese and I can’t say enough about Fritos as a topping. The pretzel bun was a nice touch, but definitely not the best pretzel bun I’ve had. Yet, with all these things going right, only one thing could ruin this burger and that was the patty itself. The burger actually featured two patties (each a quarter pound), and each were dry, brown and lifeless. Such a thing can ruin a burger and these patties really did. Subsequent visits have taught me I wasn’t just there on an off night.

But there was hope. The fries were pretty stellar and Stack’d cuts its prices to $3 a burger on Tuesday nights after 9:00. This price is perfect for these burgers and it is unlikely that I will ever go back to full price again.

Making its way into the custom burger scene in Arizona is a place called the BluBurger Grille. Similar to places like the Counter in California, BluBurger gives you a list of burger styles and loads of toppings available for them. BluBurger, however, takes customization to a new level.

Rather than restricting itself to one beef burger option, BluBurger has pulled out the stops by offering Kobe Beef (which I can only assume is actually Kobe-style beef) and Bison. Since I typically love me some buffalo, I ordered that with sharp cheddar and BBQ sauce. Adding anything else would have masked the flavor of the buffalo, so I kept my burger pretty simple. There were less options for toppings than at the Counter, but I think offering more meat more than made up for it. Also, the burger came with a side, which the Counter doesn’t include. For my side, I chose the skinny fries.

Having recently had a bad bison burger experience at the Library in Santa Monica, I was eager to replace that memory with a better one. When my burger arrived, I knew this burger would not be comparable to my bad experience. The patty was big and juicy, with just enough cheese and BBQ sauce. I bit in and was very happy with the taste. This place really knew how to cook up some bison. The fries were pretty decent, albeit small and a bit on the salty side. Luckily, the burger captured my attention for the meal and I didn’t really need to worry about the fries.

I was very happy to be reacquainted with my neglected bison friend. BluBurger is definitely a place worth seeking out in Arizona for some good ground meat on a bun.

The customizable meal has always been one of my favorites. From pizza to stir-fry, I’ve always felt that it is one of the best ways to eat. It’s basically how you would make something if you had all the ingredients yourself. The unfortunate side-effect is that if you don’t like the food, it’s your own fault. The Counter has taken the customizable concept to burgers.

Their amazing array of ingredients and choices gives and unvegan like me a world of opportunities. Of course, they have lettuce, pickles and tomatoes, but there are enough non-vegetables to really make it an unvegan burger. I ordered the 1/3 pound beef burger with, bacon, herb goat cheese, pineapples and dried cranberries. For my sauce, I got the sweet BBQ on the side (learning my lesson from last time that it is easier to dip a burger than to try to find a place for sauce on it).

I eagerly awaited my and sipping on some hefeweizen. When my burger came, it looked just as I had hoped and I began to dig in. Bite by bite, I converted my personal burger into the essential unvegan nutrients my body needs. About midway through, I bit into a problem. The bite had an undesirable crunch and taste to it. Knowing I couldn’t swallow it down, I subtly spat it into my napkin, only to find some sort of pepper! My knowledge of pepper varieties is somewhat limited, and I could only distinguish that it fell somewhere between pepperoncini and red bell pepper.

Disappointment washed over me. I consumed the remainder of my burger, but my dream of the perfectly customized burger had been crushed. When a place advertises “Custom Built Burgers,” it better deliver that without excuses.