There are a few things that you can always assume I will want to try. One is cheese dip and another is gigantic burgers (among other things). So, when I heard that a place called Roaring Fork in Scottsdale had something called the Big Ass Burger, it didn’t take much convincing to get me there. Getting me to eat outside in the middle of the desert summer, on the other hand, was a different story. But such is life when you want to take advantage of what is one of the best happy hours in the Phoenix area.

And while the Big Ass Burger has a nice discount during happy hour, there is also a little something called Queso Con Puerco, which is a cheesy dip that has braised pork mixed in. It comes with tortilla chips for dipping, but I could have easily eaten this stuff by the spoonful. The queso has a perfect thickness and viscosity, while the pork adds a meaty dimension that really every dipping sauce should have. It’s cheesy, porky goodness and it makes the world a better place simply by existing.

As for the Big Ass Burger, it comes topped with smoked pepper bacon, cheddar, poblano pepper, lettuce, tomato, pickles and onions. And also fries on the side. I ordered without the lettuce, tomato, pickles and onions, and at a medium-rare.

When it arrived, I could immediately tell that it lived up to its name. It was undoubtedly big, and would certainly contribute to the size of my ass. And somehow they found a bun to contain the meat. As I bit in, my mouth met with a juicy burger that was well-seasoned. Actually, it may have been a little too well-seasoned, as it was a little tough to handle the salt content of some of the bites. It was slightly overcooked, but not enough to really disappoint, and the bun was just a little too big. Now, with these complaints being said, they are all pretty minor and I don’t want it to seem like I didn’t like the Big Ass Burger.

On the contrary, I found it to be a very delicious experience and one that I won’t soon forget. Plus, there’s really no way to top the value for the money here during happy hour. My only hope is that next time (and there will be a next time) the meat is cooked a little more to my liking.

I’ve never understood the point of expensive sushi. When you get down to it, they’re all pretty much using the same ingredients with similar results. So when I ended up grabbing dinner at Hara Sushi in Santa Monica, I was a bit excited. Why? Because their sushi is always half-priced. And, they have a happy hour until 9:30 pm with some pretty cheap beers. So for once in my life, sushi sounded like a good time.

As soon as we were seated, we were presented with bowls of miso soup. It was a good start, but then as we looked at the menus we learned that not all was perfect in the land of Hara. As it turned out, those half-price sushis only applied to non-rolls. This felt like a bit of tease, especially considering everything interesting came in roll form. Fortunately, the rolls still kept themselves at a reasonable price. I chose the Titanic roll. Loaded with fried shrimp, then topped with spicy tuna and a chili sauce, this sounded great, but I feared it wouldn’t be enough food. To be safe, I ordered two more dishes from the half-price menu. One was the smoked salmon and the other was the crab, real crab.

When these things arrived, it was clear that the half-price sushi was not a winner. With two pieces each, these were hardly worth the price and simply didn’t taste very good. The Titanic, however, sank beautifully into my mouth. The crunch of the fried shrimp (tempura) added a nice complexity to what could have been just some more droll sushi. The spicy tuna was also nice and created a good balance with the shrimp. The chili sauce wasn’t exactly spicy, but it did add some nice flavor and made the roll taste good even without soy sauce and wasabi. Of course, I still dipped the pieces in those, but I didn’t feel the need to.

While the crab and salmon were disappointing, I have to say I was pretty happy for the included miso soup. And then, when we thought we were done, out came green tea ice cream, also included in our meals. This was some of the strangest green tea ice cream I had ever had – mainly because it hardly tasted like green tea. Instead, it was a strong vanilla ice cream that had just a hint of green tea flavor. I like my green tea strong though, so while I was happy this was included, I would have liked it to hold true to its name a little better. travelwithgirls.com

So here’s the deal with Hara Sushi. Don’t get excited about the half-price because those pieces of fish just aren’t worth it. But if you like some rolls and beers for a pretty good price, it is not a bad place to get some raw fish inside you.

What’s the first thing you think about when someone tells you you’re going to a place called Garage Pizza? Flying unicorns with laser beam eyes? Doing the backstroke through a sea of sour patch gummy worms? No, you think of pizza found down a shady back alley with a haggard old man selling you a grimy looking slice of pizza out of a homemade oven built from used industrial parts. Thankfully none of those are true (despite the fact that flying unicorns with laser beam eyes are pretty sweet and totally real) and I can happily say that Garage Pizza is a legitimate, mostly haggard-free, pizza establishment.

What started as a small operation in Silverlake, Garage Pizza has quickly expanded to a still small but thoroughly delicious downtown location. I met up with a couple friends at their downtown spot under the guise of checking out Garage Pizza’s happy hour, where in truth I really wanted to “mack” on the hostess I had met once before. Yes, I still say mack. Sadly, the hostess was not there, but their tasty pizza and bargain prices were ever present. The happy hour deal I speak of is $6 for a slice of pizza w/ two toppings and a cold glass of med-high quality beer. Not too shabby, eh? And if you really like beer they have a premium selection of beer and two slices for $15. All between the hours of 5-8 PM, I think I can deal with that.

Anyway, what was I writing? Pizza! Yes. After some deliberation with friendos (including your favorite unvegan, Zack) I decided to follow suit with Zack and get one slice with sausage/pepperoni and one with meatball/bacon. How it works, as with most places with slice pizza, is that you select the toppings and they put it on an already-made slice of cheese pizza and then they reheat it in the oven. Not the most optimal way to have your pizza but definitely not the worst if you want awesome, meaty toppings.

The slices arrived about fifteen minutes after ordering and damn, they looked beautiful. Large slices containing bountiful amounts of meat layered haphazardly with complete disregard for my cholesterol’s well being. Just the way I like it. Of the two slices, the bacon/meatball was by far the winner. I mean, just look at that slice! And who can really compete with bacon anyway? Get outta here pepperoni! As for the bread, it had a nice chew and a crispy crust that balanced out the pizza quite well. The only thing that really didn’t stand out much was the sauce, I pretty much forgot about it’s existence as I swooned over the delicious meats piled atop my pizza.

New York-style pizza like the one at Garage Pizza has become a dime a dozen in LA. From Tomato Pie to Village Pizzeria to Two Boots Pizza – Garage Pizza has its competition. How does it fare in comparison? Quite well, but not the front runner. It’s a solid slice and they have a variety of specialty pizzas that are quite original, but this place isn’t going to make it to the top until they improve their sauce. And their dough, while very good, isn’t the best I’ve had out here. What they do have on the foes is a superior amount of toppings. I say amount because they completely cover the pizza with toppings, no skimping here, which I love. Not to mention, they have a nice menu of sandwiches and salads to compliment the non-pizza and non-unvegan eater (shame on them though, going to a pizza place and not ordering pizza), which while I did not try looked to have potential for decency.

Is Garage Pizza worthy of existence in the pizza world? It is decidedly so. Should you grab a slice if you’re in the area? As I see it, yes. Do dinosaurs have feathered skin? Recent signs point to yes. Am I a meat popsicle? Better not tell you now. Am I asking questions with magic 8-ball responses? Without a doubt.

-Thanks to the Danto himself for the illustrious and imaginative guest post.

On a short trip down to San Diego to visit a friend, I only ended up having time for one meal, so I wanted to make it good. I was told the Gas Lamp area was a great part of town to find some grub, so we took a stroll through that part of downtown to see what we could find.

After checking out a couple menus prominently displayed outside of restaurants, we chose Urban Bar & Grill, mostly because they had a pretty great happy hour going on. Aside from some pretty swanky drink specials, all appetizers were half-priced. We took our seats at the lovely outdoor patio and opened our menus. Even though the main courses looked good, I knew I had to stick to the awesomely priced appetizers.

The two meatiest options were the chicken satay and buffalo wings. I ordered a set of each to mix up my palette and chilled out, enjoying the nice weather and atmosphere. When my food came, I was pretty impressed by the arrangement of the satay. Three skewers of chicken were impaling a hunk of pineapple and surrounded thin strips reminiscent of styrofoam. The presentation of the buffalo wings was pretty basic comparatively although there were a couple veggies in there that severely dipped my appreciation of the presentation.

Despite the presentation, I was a little disappointed to find the satay tasted pretty generic. It was good, but didn’t impress. The buffalo wings were pretty much the same story. I enjoyed the sauce, but was a little disappointed that the wings weren’t wings at all, but actually drumsticks. A lot of people prefer drummies, but I prefer when a menu doesn’t lie. These complaints aside, my meal was fulfilling, and even more so with the happy hour discount. Had the appetizers been full-priced, I may not have been such a happy camper, but I guess happy hour lived up to its name.

In my never-ending quest for the perfect happy hour in LA, I wound up at Gyu-Kaku in West LA for Japanese BBQ. With five minutes left in their Happy Hour, we arrived and were told there was a ten minute wait. Discouraged, we still decided to make the best of it and took our seats after the wait. Our zealous waiter checked his watch as he arrived at the table and disappointedly reminded us that we had just missed happy hour. We told him that we knew, but we had tried to arrive on time and had to wait. Quickly thinking, he told us he was actually a manager and he would give us happy hour prices for our first round of ordering. Score!

Happy hour at Gyu-Kaku means a lot of things, such as 50% off appetizers, three kinds of meat for $2.95 and 99 cent Kirin drafts. For our appetizer, we ordered Fried Chicken Karaage, a favorite Japanese dish of mine. Karaage is a special Japanese way of frying chicken that tastes distinctly different than other fried chicken I’ve ever had. Unfortunately, the chicken at Gyu-Kaku didn’t have that distinct taste, despite being pretty good regular fried chicken.

For the main course, we ordered all three of the

happy hour meats: Bistro Harami, Kalbi Chuck and Chicken Tender. Knowing this wouldn’t be enough to satisfy my carnivorous hunger, we also ordered the Harami Miso Skirt Steak, which we were told was their most popular meat. Taking a slight detour from the straight up meats, we ordered some clay pot rice called the Sukiyaki Bibimbap. This came with beef, onions, sukiyaki sauce and rice of course. Being a good boyfriend, I didn’t order without onions and just planned to eat around them when they came so my girlfriend could have them.

Our waiter soon brought out all of our uncooked

meats and instructed us on how to cook them ourselves. He was really knowledgeable about how long we should cook each meat and on which part of the grill, so we went to work fully prepared. Each meat seemed to taste better than the last. The chicken was well seasoned, although it couldn’t compete with the beef cuts, which felt like they melted in my mouth. Each beef cut was different in taste and thickness and they all found their way to a happy place in my stomach. The best, by far was their signature dish, the Harami Miso Skirt Steak, and was worth the premium cost of $7.95.

When the waiter brought the Sukiyaki Bibimbap to the table, it was already steaming, but then he performed the whole process of stirring for us, probably because we were too busy cooking the rest of our food. By the time he finished, the rice was nice and crispy, with the strong sukiyaki taste I love. I managed to avoid the onions pretty well and still enjoyed it.

In the end, I was incredibly satisfied with my meal. I was able to eat a variety of different meats, drink some beer and avoid vegetables for an entire meal. The happy hour was a great deal that I look forward to enjoying again.

The Green Mill (affectionately referred to as “The Mill”) in Duluth is a place I have to visit every time I’m in the area. It not only has good food and drinks, but it has a great happy hour as well. What used to be 1/2 price appetizers and wings has now become 5 bucks. This isn’t such a big deal, since the prices are still so low.

Through many visits, I finally discovered the best that The Mill has to offer, Dixie Wings. These are wings with a buffalo-like sauce that stings the mouth, but always leaves me wanting more. The Mill is also one of the few places where I opt for boneless wings versus the much manlier wings with bones. For some reason, the Dixie Wing sauce just seems to work so much better with boneless wings.

The only disappointing thing, which I encounter almost every time I order wings of any sort, is the additional veggies. I’m sorry, but I don’t need celery to cool down my mouth after eating hot wings. That’s what beer is for. Luckily these stalks of green had no impact on the taste of my food, other than making my plate look slightly less appetizing.

The never-ending search for a great happy hour in LA led me to Islands, a burger chain out in the west that reminds me a bit of Applebees with an island theme (what island that is, I cannot tell).

For their happy hour, they offer a great discount on drinks, as well as half-priced apps. They had some good-looking unvegan apps like Tiki (Chicken) Tenders and Cheddar Fries, but when places offer half apps, there’s really only one food I have in mind: Buffalo Wings!

With the knowledge that the wings came with carrots and celery, I made a great personal sacrifice and allowed the dish to come with them so my girlfriend could eat them. I know that makes me look soft, but at least I had spicy wings and beer. I also asked for blue cheese dressing instead of ranch. I’m really not sure who decided that ranch would go well with wings, but that person was wrong. It’s all about the blue cheese.

The wings were surprisingly good, and very spicy. I had to use a good amount of the blue cheese and beer to keep my taste buds functioning. Even so, they had a good, generic flavor that wasn’t overwhelmed by the heat.

Next time I need a good meal at a very cheap happy hour price, I’ll have to keep Islands in mind.